Had a dream last night that started with me and Goodwin walking over some hills to get to town. When we arrived, there was a concert going on and a man was rapping an infomercial for some cleaning product.

After that act, I got on stage to join in a play that Zooey Deschanel was putting on. I fancied her but I didn’t tell her that. She was going out with a Russian guy (in the play) but really she fancied a guy who looked like Snape from Harry Potter. I pretended to sleep in an armchair, but secretly I was listening to them. I heard Zooey say “Yes, I went out with the circus boy. Did I make him constipated? I don’t know.”

Zooey then proceeded to sing a rude version of Sunday Girl (by Blondie) and suddenly I left to sit in the audience to watch. After a while, Mak – who was sat next to me – grabbed my leg and said we had to leave. I agreed and stood up, let him walk off and then I sat back down again. I didn’t really want to leave. There were only about 10 seats in the audience and I was sat next to my friend Laura, though she had blonde hair.

Later, Zooey was at home eating pizza when the Russian guy from the play came in. He said he wanted to make their relationship work – I wasn’t sure if he was in character or not at this point – but she said “It’s like this pizza, there’s no meat left in it.”

The Russian guy then accidentally turned the hob up and singed Zooey’s hair. There was a pizza in a box inside the oven, but when they took it out the pizza was burnt but the box was not. Zooey said, “It’s an anomaly.”