Last night I had an odd dream. I dreamt that my brother was having an affair with one of the girls from Little Mix, Leigh-Anne. I found out when I walked in on him with all four girls in his bed.

I was not impressed – if perhaps a little jealous – so while they were out washing his car, I snuck into his room and decided to play Little Mix songs loudly to draw attention to them. Then I remembered I don’t know any Little Mix songs, so I just played some R.E.M. songs really loud, but only the slow ones so they couldn’t dance.

After a while, my brother came into his room and said he’d heard the lyrics to Leaving New York and realised that what he was doing was wrong, so he ended it with Leigh-Anne, who, as I saw looking out of the window, was now walking down the road looking sad and carrying a bucket of soapy water.

Now, the strangest thing about all of this is that I don’t even like Little Mix. What’s more, I don’t know any of their names. I looked them up after the dream and was very surprised to find that Leigh-Anne is actually one of their names. So it has slightly perturbed me that my mind knew that – even the right spelling as well. I’ve obviously seen it written somewhere or heard it on the radio, but it’s an odd choice of artist to feature in my dream.