I was looking for a day trip for Mike’s birthday. Found one on Amazon called “Places in Leeds that changed the world beginning with M”. They had all the other letters (except Z, but including X). Mother thought it was a silly idea.

I went to Paris for 2 days on my own. Wimpole Wit was the name of the road I stayed on. On the first night I forgot my wallet and only had a few pounds, but remembered I also had lots of euros in another wallet I had.

In a bar met two kids called Louis and Luke (who looked and sounded like two guys calle Louis and Luke I knew in school) and another kid whose name I forget. I ordered gammon hock stew. A guy came in and asked if they do Risotto. They didn’t do risotto but the place next door did but they had a big queue.

Luke said to me “Look at you, you’re a gorm. I’ll call you Al Gorm. Or Gormless Who. And you’ll say ‘Last chance to get a receipt’.” That line made me burst out laughing and he said ‘Yeah, I get it too’.

I went to Eiffel Tower and saw a guy dressed as 4th Doctor. The lift went round in circles.