Say cheese ma’am

Had a dream last night where I was at work. When I got there, my boss, Dave, wasn’t there, but there were about 15 people in there. They were all young, about my age, and dressed in a school uniform with a blue badge. Apparently he’d hired loads of people and they’d all actually turned up. I got talking to one of them, who I think was an old friend from school.

After a while, Dave came in and was surprised to see all the people. He walked around the room and spoke to a few of them. He asked them basic questions to do with the job and when a couple of people got them wrong, he sent them home.

We were all sent to a big hall where we were going to be given a lecture and a task. I didn’t really have to go, because I was still the only designer so I wouldn’t be fired, but I went anyway.

There were a few people on the stage at the bottom and they gave a talk about something, I can’t remember what. Then one girl was told to set us a task. She was a dark haired girl with a pale face. She tried to announce it, but she kept stuttering and getting all nervous. Eventually, someone else set the task. It was a maths challenge, with a few difficult sums. I did one, but they stopped us after about 10 seconds.

After the test, we all went back to a common room and we were in our pyjamas. I went out to get some food, but quickly realised I was still in my pyjamas and headed back, seeing Goodwin on the way. He said he’d see me later.

I met up with him a bit later and we went off to London to have a tour of Buckingham Palace. As we were walking down a corridor, I saw the queen sitting on a chair with a sign advertising photograph opportunities with her. I walked past, but then went back and bought a photo opportunity.

I was told to sit down on a chair to the right of her and wait until the photographer was ready. There was a small table between us and a bookcase on the left of her.

We waited for a while and had a bit of a chat. She told me she didn’t actually want to keep being queen. She said “I feel like I’ve done my share and now I just want to stop.” I suggested she could retire, and she was quite keen on the idea.

I was getting bored, so I ate some biscuits. But then the Queen asked me a question and, since it’s rude to talk with your mouth full, I ran off to the toilet and spat it out.

When I came back, someone had dropped the books off the bookcase onto the floor. I picked them up to put them back, but the Queen kept tutting and complaining that I’d put them in the wrong place, so in the end I left it.

I eventually got my photo with the Queen and left.

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